Many women, after experiencing the ill-treatment of a partner, swear to themselves that they will never again meet with such a man ... and after a while realize that they have again fallen into the same trap. How to understand in advance that you are a tyrant?
Of course, no woman would want to become a victim of violence. And being in such a toxic relationship, it does not immediately decide to admit it. According to American statistics, for example, women only after 5-7 cases of violence decide to part with a partner, and someone does not dare at all. And many later time again fall into the same trap. But it could have been avoided. Here are the obvious signals of danger, which should immediately alert us, according to the memo of the American Women's Center (The Women's Center). 1. At the beginning of a relationship, he forces events. We have not yet had time to look back, and he already passionately assures: "No one has ever loved me the way you do!" And literally forces us to live together.
2. He is constantly jealous. He is a terrible owner, he always calls us or unexpectedly to us without warning.
3. He wants to control everything. The partner persistently inquires about what you talked with your friends, where you were, checks your car's car rally, manages common money, requires checks for purchases, wants to be asked permission to go somewhere or do something.
4. He has unrealistic expectations on your account. He expects that you will be perfect in everything and will satisfy any of his whims.
5. We find ourselves in isolation. He wants to isolate us from friends and family, does not allow us to use a phone or a car, does not allow us to look for work.
6. In his own mistakes he blames others. His boss, family, partner - anyone, but not him, is to blame if something goes wrong.
7. Other people are responsible for his feelings. He says, "You made me angry," instead of saying, "I'm pissed off." "I would not be so angry if you did not ..."
8. He is hypersensitive. He takes offense at any occasion and arranges scenes because of the slightest injustice, how full of life.
9. He cruelly treats animals and children. He mercilessly punishes or even kills animals. From children, he can demand what they can not, or tease, bringing them to tears.
10. He likes playing violence in bed. For example, to hurl a partner backward or forcefully hold in place against her will. He is excited by fantasies about rape. He forces you - by force or manipulation - to do what you are not prepared for.
11. He uses verbal violence. He constantly criticizes you or says something unpleasant: depreciates you, scolds, calls, remembers painful moments from your past or present, while assuring that you yourself are to blame for everything.
12. He is a supporter of rigid gender roles in relations. You must serve him, obey and stay at home.
13. His mood changes dramatically. Just that he was affectionate and loving - and suddenly he suddenly becomes enraged.
14. He happened to use physical violence. He confesses that in the past he raised his hand against the woman, but explains it by circumstances or assures that the victim himself brought him.
15. He threatens with violence. For example, he can say: "I'll break your neck!", But then he will assure me that he did not say it seriously.
At a minimum, these signs indicate that our partner is prone to emotional abuse. But with a high probability it will sooner or later grow into a physical one.